After my bags were loaded up, I took my seat by the taxista and off we went. And it was in that moment that I think I finally realized that my mission was drawing to a close. I looked back as the mission office fell from view. My heart sunk as I will not see that building again as a missionary. And it`s not even the building that made my head whirl. That building, the mission office, represented a connection to all the missionaries in Campinas and to the mission itself. So when that building got cut off from view, to me that sort of meant that the mission, the dear missionaries I met, all my companions, President and Sister Perrotti, all the members in the eight areas I served, the routines, the lessons, the intensity of the work, the burden, the power, the memories - all of these were cut away from my life in that split second. I turned in my seat to face forward and chatted a little with the taxista but all the while I was surveying the avenues and great, tall buildings of downtown Campinas, trying to enjoy one last long look.
As myself and four other missionaries got to the rodoviaria [bus station] and took the bus to Sao Paulo, and then the flight to Atlanta and arrived at the airport there, my head was swirling. It got worse when I found myself alone in Atlanta - the other four missionaries had departed the plane and gone their separate ways and I hadn't said goodbye to any one of them. I went to my next gate and found a seat. I was there two hours early so it was almost empty. I just sat there for a few minutes and sipped the root beer I had just bought. I needed to say a prayer. I didn’t feel comfortable doing it at the gate even with so few people there, so I finished my drink and I went to the bathroom and locked myself in one of the stalls. I opened myself to God in prayer and told Him everything that I was feeling. I felt comforted. It’s interesting how sometimes we have to be put in situations that make us stressed or worried or desperate so that we can learn how to really pray - I mean, pray with real intent and with all your heart.
I returned and noticed a huge poster on the wall next to the gate that read “Let each man pass his days in that endeavor wherein his gift is greatest.” Two years ago, I was at the gate beside this when I met with another 30 or so nervous missionaries to take the plane to Sao Paulo. I had read this quote from Propertius and I had agreed with it. But this time, as I sat thinking, I saw it from another angle. I don’t know if I agree with that quote anymore. The scriptures teach us that we should search for the best gifts of the Spirit. They teach us that those who come unto Christ with humbleness will have their weaknesses made into strengths. Christ taught that we should even be perfect, as is God. It seems to me that God wants us to pass our days perfecting ourselves in all endeavors. And we can. If we want to. If we are not willing to let God modify a few things in our lives - our desires, our hopes, our dreams - then we will seemingly be much more happy spending our life doing only that which is more pleasing or wherein our gift is greatest. However, we will always from thereon live in a partial happiness because we are not, and do not choose to be, happy when we are forced into other less pleasing endeavors throughout our day-to-day experiences.
Choose to be happy. Choose to let God teach you how to be happy in all that you do. Choose to do all that you can to understand the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I know He is our Savior. I have seen some of my many weaknesses become strengths during this mission. Through repentance and understanding of His Atonement, I am free to vanquish my bad habits and my pride. Please take some time to study His Atonement, ponder it in your heart, and pray with all the desire of your heart to know that it is true and to understand it. I want you to feel the comfort and freedom that I feel.
Even though I will probably not see everyone that I met on the mission later in life, I know that I will meet them again at Judgment Day. I know that life is eternal and that our Heavenly Father has wonderful things in store for us, especially for those who do their honest best in this life.
Thank you so much all of you for reading my posts and I desire the best for all of you. If you'd like to get in contact with me please send me an email.
(Elder) AJ Bradford
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| Snapshot at the airport we sent to AJ's sister, Taylor, to signal he was home (she's attending BYU in Provo) |
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| AJ posing in front of poster his sisters (Lexi and Ellie) and Mom made to greet him at the airport |
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| Picture taken by the dad of a sister missionary that was also returning home that afternoon |
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| AJ surveys a map we created of his mission, cities where he served, and list of missionary companions |
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| AJ after his interview with (Stake) President Shafer, who officially released him from missionary service |
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| AJ shows off the shoes he wore home |
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| Certificate presented to AJ upon completing his mission service |
